Pick Your Brain
by pinkwolf1620
Summary: Taken away from her family, brainwashed and made into a fearless assassin, Natasha has forgotten everything in her past life. Until she get's her first mission and meets a handsome man with the code name Hawkeye who is sent to kill her. Intead he sees potential in her, can he break through and save her? Please read/review. My first fanfiction.
1. Prologue

**A/N: This is my first fanfiction. Be nice and feel free to leave any comments/suggestions.**

PROLOGUE: THE BEGINNING

The room was filled with the sound of fingers tapping on keyboards, mouses clicking and the drone of voices. Everyone had been working hard all day and their work was almost complete. They only had to find one more, just one more, and they could end this part of the programme.  
Ivan Petrovich oversaw all applicants, most seemed promising and were brought in. He had arranged several 'accidents' that would make it easier to obtain them: a car crash here, an explosion there or a simple over-looked gas-leak. All were successful.

It had taken some time to gather all the applicants together, more time than he thought, but all the girls looked strong and, given adequate training and time, they would become loyal and powerful. They would do his bidding and he would reward them splendidly.

A voice broke through Ivans train of thought "Сэр, мы нашли еще один" Ivan raced over and peered at the computer screen. It showed a picture of a girl, no more than 10 years old, she had curly red hair and soft looking white skin.  
All her information was there, only two parents to deal with, lived reasonably close, in Stalingrad, no brothers and sisters to speak of.  
" Приведите ее в"

The trucks zoomed along a quiet road under the cover of darkness. They were almost there and everyone knew the plan. Ivan sat in the back with a pillow, a blanket and a bottle in his hand.  
The house came into view.  
The blueprints they had obtained about the house informed Ivan that little Natalias room was on the second floor and facing the street.  
The trunks halted a little ways from the house, men dressed in black got out and started for the house carrying guns, bottles of fluid and tiny boxes of matches. They were instructed not to hurt the girl but to do what was necessary to others involved.

Ivan waited in the truck, he watched as the men entered the two story building, all was quiet. Ivan knew what would be happening, the liquid would be poured over everything and the girl would be left un-touched until the last possible moment.  
Shouts erupted from the house, a mans and then a womans, followed quickly by gunfire. From the truck, Ivan could see shadows and dancing firelight in the windows – then the man came out carrying the screaming girl; Natalia Romonova.

They quickly sped away, Ivan holding the girl in his arms whispering in her ear that everything was going to be ok, until he wet a piece of cloth with the bottle of liquid and placed it firmly over her mouth. Natalia slipped into a reluctant sleep still calling for her mother and father.

**A/N: I know this is short. I suck at writing long things but I will get better in time.**

TRANSLATION:

Сэр, мы нашли еще один - _Sir, we have found another  
_

Приведите ее в - _Bring her in_


	2. Chapter 1: BRAINWASHING

CHAPTER 2: BRAINWASHING

Natalia awoke in a large room. She was on a bed, under the covers and despite what had happened to her; she was comfortable. Natalia sat up with a jolt and cried out for her mother and father, her tiny voice rang and echoed back to her, again she called "Мумия! Папа!" she raced out of bed and grabbed the door handle; to her surprise it was unlocked.  
Panting, Natalia ran down a random hallway blindly searching for her parents, a man appeared stepping out of a room ahead of her "НАТАЛЬЯ!" The sound of her name on his lips made Natalia stop in her tracks, the man stepped toward her and extended a hand "Моя дорогая. Ты хорошо спала?"  
Natalia said nothing  
"Ты спал в течение долгого времени. Ты голоден?"  
When Natalia still said nothing, the man smiled warmly and urged her to follow him. He led her down the hall, the sound of cutlery and voices talking and laughing reached them.

A door opened and inside Natalia saw small girls, all around her age, eating and talking and laughing. The man urged her inside and when the girls saw him, they stopped eating "Папа!" they all greeted him with the same warmth  
" Дочери! Это ваша новая сестра, Наталья, заботиться о ней" The man nodded and stepped out of the room  
" Мы будем отец!"

Natalia was welcomed into the group of girls, seated at a table and given a bowl of cereal and a glass of juice, the food went untouched. Natalia eyed the girls. How could they all by daughters of that man? They all looked different, different hair, eyes, skin. However the girls didn't seem to question their 'father' when Natalia mentioned it.  
She asked where her own parents were, why she was here and why they were there. The girls simply said that Ivan was her father now, always had been and that they were safe from danger. Natalia felt odd sitting with these girls, what was wrong with them? At the mention of 'father' their eyes changed and went all unfocused and dream like.  
Natalia wanted to get away as soon as possible.

OOOOOOO

It was sometime later when Natalia was taken from the room, the girls excitedly waving goodbye, and marched off between a man and a woman. They said she was being taken to see her father and for 'testing'. Natalia almost leapt out of her skin when they came to a door, knocked and went in. Ivan stood there next to a chair and a very large screen, he welcomed Natalia "Дочь, моя дорогая Наталья!"  
Natalia only stared at Ivan. This man would never be her father.  
Ivan commanded the others to leave them and went to look at the screen before typing in a few keys. Natalia only stood there quietly, waiting for the moment when she could ask for her real father and to be taken home!

Ivan asked Natalia to sit, and when she did, he began a lengthy explanation.  
He began with saying how lucky she was, how fortunate that a girl such as herself would be chosen to be part of such an elite programme. Ivan then mentioned that all of the other girls were lucky too and that each and everyone of them had a special skill. A skill that he would help hone and help them to one day use it for 'the common good'.  
He said that even though they weren't his real daughters they had come to love him and he cared for them too. Ivan explained that he knew it was hard for her but, in time, she too would forget about her real parents and friends and come to think of him as a father.

Natalia listened intently as he went on to explain about the Black Widow Ops and what they did. His Black Widows were women (and some men) who were trained in many forms and helped right all the wrongs in the world and help people see the wrongs that they did or were doing.  
Natalia tried to get up and leave, Ivan was frightening her, but he held her down in the chair and tied her to it "Я хотел было проще, Наталья. В конце концов, вы будете видеть вещи ясно мой дорогой" Ivan went back over to the screen and keyboard, ignoring Natalias screams.

With a soft beep, the screen came alive, Natalia suddenly stopped screaming, it was like her voice refused her, and she watched helplessly as hundreds of pictures flicked across the screen. A voice in the screen said over and over "Вы здесь в безопасности. Вас любят. Твой отец любит тебя, как сделать ваши сестры. Ваша жизнь прекрасна здесь." There were pictures of Natalia with her parents, then just Natalia, then a strange picture came up with Natalia in the arms of Ivan. They were laughing and pointed toward the camera, they looked happy.  
A jolt ran through her body and seemed to rest in her brain, another jolt came when another happy picture of her and Ivan and the girls came on screen. Another picture, another jolt. Another. Another.

Natalia had lost all sense of time while looking at the pictures, they seemed to go on forever. Until finally, when it seemed like her brain would burst, it was over.  
The pictures stopped, the screen went black and Natalia slumped back in her chair with her eyes closed. Ivan came forward, released her from the chair and whispered for her to wake up.

Natalia roused like she had been woken rudely from a pleasant dream.

She looked up into Ivan's smiling face, for a moment she looked confused. Natalia reached out and touched Ivan on the cheek with her finger. Smiling, only one word managed to escape her lips:

"Папа"

**A/N: Thanks so much for reading this. I enjoyed writing it and sorry about all the Russian, in future chapters there will be less of it so you won't need to scroll to the translation all the time.**

TRANSLATION (in order):

Мумия! Папа! – _Mummy! Daddy!_

НАТАЛЬЯ! – _NATALIA!  
_Моя дорогая. Ты хорошо спала? – _My darling. Did you sleep well?_

Ты спал в течение долгого времени. Ты голоден? – _You slept for a long time. Are you hungry?_

Дочери! Это ваша новая сестра, Наталья, заботиться о ней – _Daughters! This is your new sister, Natalia, take care of her_

Мы будем отец! – _we will father!_

Дочь, моя дорогая Наталья! - _Daughter, my__dear__Natalia__!___

Я хотел было проще, Наталья. В конце концов, вы будете видеть вещи ясно мой дорогой – _I wish it was easier, Natalia. In time, you will see things clearly my dear_

Вы здесь в безопасности. Вас любят. Твой отец любит тебя, как сделать ваши сестры. Ваша жизнь прекрасна здесь – _You are safe here. You are loved. Your father loves you, as do your sisters. Your life is good here.__  
_


	3. Chapter 2: FIRST MISSIONS

_10 years later._

Natalia was out of breath and panting, everything hurt yet she tried not to show it. They were after her, they would kill her if they got the chance. She refused to give them that.  
She cocked her gun and ran for the nearest cover, there she lay low for a few minutes until she could figure out her next move.  
Under a computer desk, she figured it was only 30 paces to the door and she would be free. Natalia tried not to get her hopes up yet, she still wasn't in the clear.  
To her left she heard the sound of running feet, she guessed three, and to her right was two more; they were closing in and they knew it. Just when Natalia was about to make a dash for the door, the desk was overturned and a gun was pointed at her head "Сдавайтесь, вы окружены, и мы знаем, что у вас есть только одна пуля слева"  
"Не сегодня!" Natalia lashed out and kicked her assailant, knocking the gun from her hand. Another was upon her, landing a punch to Natalias jaw but was met by a fierce blow to the stomach.

Natalia ran for the door, another attacker laughed from the side but Natalia was ready and dodged them, ducking down and then coming back up to land a punch to the sternum, winding them. Two down and only three more to go. Natalia hoped she could make it.  
She reached for her gun, shot at a pipe above two more agents and they screamed as steam poured out all over them.  
One more to go.  
Natalia was pulled down and pinned to the floor, the last agent held a large knife to her neck and pushed against Natalias grip, aiming the blade at her jugular. Natalia pulled her knees up either side of the agent, gripped and flipped the agent off her.

Throwing the knife away and grabbing her gun, Natalia was quick to gain the upper hand. With the gun pointed at them and no weapon of their own, the agent admitted defeat.

Before Natalia could pull the trigger, a loud bell sounded above them "Слава Богу! Я не мог принять многое другое!" Natalia sighed and dropped the gun  
"Вы не могли взять больше? Ну, мы лучше остановиться тогда!" The agent on the ground laughed as Natalia helped her to her feet.  
Natalia smiled tiredly at her friend, Anya was a skilled fighter and her signature weapon was her knives, nobody in the entire programme could wield one like her.  
Anya and Natalia gathered the other Black Widow agents together, they all started joking around and comparing battle wounds after the training session and headed for the bathing room where many showers and a large bath awaited them.

As the hot water soothed her aches and pains, Natalia thought on how much she had changed over the years. She had become strong and fast and was handy with a whole variety of weapons. Ivan had sent her sisters away on special jobs, sometimes they would be gone for days or even months and they always came back and raved about what they did.

It wasn't that Natalia was jealous, she just wanted to know when it was going to be _her time_ to finally go on a mission and make her father proud!

As she was getting out of the shower to dry herself, a voice sounded over the intercom that she was needed in her father's office. Her sisters all started to give each other looks, Anya punched Natalia playfully and commented that now was finally her time and that Ivan was trying to surprise her.  
Natalia quickly got dressed and raced to Ivan's office, knocking twice and then going straight in to sit down at his desk.  
Her hair was still dripping onto the floor so she hastily put it up in a bun to strop the dripping, Ivan came in and greeted his daughter "Hello Natalia"  
for the past year Ivan had been teaching the girls to speak various languages, starting with English, and used it without warning to keep them sharp in their language skills  
"Hello father, thank you for seeing me" Natalia was quick to respond  
"Tell me how the training session went"  
"Well father, Anya is getting better with her knives every day. She mentioned how much of a help they were on her last mission" Natalia eyed her father and put slight emphasis on the word 'mission'  
Ivan nodded in agreement "yes she is good with a knife, nice clean buts and never too much mess to clean up afterwards"  
"Father, I wanted to ask you something. Anya and the others always go on missions. When will it be my turn?" Natalia tried not to sound too desperate.

Ivan got up and went over to a filing cabinet, pulled out a folder and placed it in front of Natalia. Flipping through the papers and photos inside, Natalia saw black and white pictures of a man and on the papers at the top was a name that read Professor Anton Vanko.  
Ivan explained that this man used to work for him and helped create the Black Widow Ops, he used to be his most trusted colleague and friend. Then one day the professor decided that America held better and more promising opportunities. Natalia continued to flip through Vanko's papers and work while Ivan went on to say that he could no longer be trusted now that he is in America and that he betrayed everyone in the Black Widow Ops and he must be punished for his actions.

Ivan explained that Natalia would finally have her first mission "I have gain information that my old friend is going to be hosting a party in America and I have two invitations, forged of course, and it will be up to you, Natalia, to kill Professor Vanko. Can you do that for me my dear?"  
Natalia looked at the photos again, overlooked all of Vankos work. There was no doubt that this man was well respected in America and used to be in Russia. This was her first mission. Natalia was scared and excited, she had severely hurt people before and used a gun several times during training but had never actually _killed _someone.  
This was Natalias chance to prove to her father that she was a good agent, the best there was in all of Black Widow Ops! She wanted to make her father proud.  
"Yes father, I will make you proud" and she hugged him feeling butterflies in her stomach as she thought about the mission.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The target was in sight ready and waiting. The room was almost pitch black yet the figure in the corner still wore sunglasses.  
With a few deep breaths, a large black bow was lifted and strung, strong fingers and arm muscles held the bow with ease over years and years of training; now it felt like nothing at all. With a slight twang, the arrow flew through the air, the sunglasses were quickly removed so as to see the final blow, the arrow hit the target in a perfect bullseye.  
With a woop for joy the archer turned on the lights and walked over to his target. He almost never missed.

Agent Clint Barton had been a member of S.H.I.E.L.D since he was a young child, a man named Phill Coulson had picked him up after seeing him perform at a medieval festival. The boy had been adopted by a man who worked with horses at the festival, taught him to ride and use a bow and often saw the boy perform various stunts.  
Phil saw the boys potential and Nick Fury gave him permission to bring the boy in. Clint was adopted by the S.H.I.E.L.D agency after his first adoptive father claimed that he could have a better life with S.H.I.E.L.D and go on to do better things other than perform on a stage or with horses.  
It was a bittersweet moment for Clint and he would regularly keep in touch with his father and sometimes would go to see a show. Only he never went into detail about what he actually did for S.H.I.E.L.D and his father didn't want to know.

Clint was broken out of his pondering by a knock at the door, he turned and smiled when he saw Phil standing there "hey Phil" he gestured to the target "could hardly see a thing! Almost totally blind and I still managed to get a bullseye!"  
Phil Coulson smiled at the young archer and clasped him on the shoulder in a friendly way "that is very good Clint and I have some good news for you. Nick has told me to come and get you for your briefing, you're going on your first mission"  
Clint punched the air enthusiastically "Really? It's about time! I wonder where it will be?"  
"You'll find out soon enough"

Clint nodded his greetings to General Fury as he walked into the room with a file and placed it in front of him. Inside were several documents detailing the efforts and dealings of the Black Widow Ops, according to the papers they were a spy organisation based in Russia and were find of using orphan girls to train and become spies.  
Clint eyed Fury questioningly "is the mission in Russia, sir?"  
"Not exactly. We have reason to believe that one of our allies, Professor Vanko, is going to be assassinated by someone in the Black Widow Ops." Before Clint could say anything Nick Fury went on: "Anton Vanko is an ex-Russian scientist who specialises in electricity and making weapons. A few years ago he defected after whatever it was that held him so tightly to Ivan Petrovitch broke down and started working for us"  
"So, he was brainwashed but broke free? Is that what they do to everyone in Black Widow?"  
"More or less. He was brainwashed but we managed to break through because he hadn't been working with Ivan for very long, only about three years. Now he is one of us and has been in hiding but now he has been targeted by his old organization"  
Clint thought for a moment and then asked "so what am I meant to do?"  
"Vanko is hosting a party this Friday night. This is when we think the assassination is going to take place, your job is to protect Vanko by any means necessary. You will escort him to and from the party and only leave his side when necessary or when he tells you. Vanko knows how to take care of himself but it never hurts to have better protection" Nick shook the young agents hand "think you can do this Agent Barton?"  
Clint felt butterflies in his stomach and couldn't help the goofy smile on his face at the mention of 'Agent' before his name, he composed himself "Yes sir. I won't let you down"

Clint took the file from Fury's desk so that he could read through everything in his room.  
Finally he was going on his first mission!  
Back in his room he read over the papers about the Black Widow Ops, 'being brainwashed to think you are someone else and made into a spy' Clint thought 'mustn't be very pleasant' and he felt awful at the notion of little girls being taken and made into killing machines.  
Clint hated the idea but would kill one of them to protect Vanko, he had to protect him.

He went to bed that night thinking about them and asked himself that when the time came to it, _could he actually kill someone who didn't know who they really were?_ It just didn't seem fair.

**A/N: WOW This is a long one! I never thought I would be able to write something like this! Natalia has her first mission and CLINT IS FINALLY ON THE SCENE!  
I was thinking about introducing him in the next chapter but since this is his first mission too, I thought he deserved to be in it.**

TRANSLATION (in order):

Слава Богу! Я не мог принять многое другое! – Thank God! I couldn't take much more!

Вы не могли взять больше? Ну, мы лучше остановиться тогда! - You could not take any more? Well, we'd better stop then!


	4. Chapter 3: THE PARTY

Natalia gripped her napkin tightly in her hands, twisting it this way and that as the car got closer and closer to the building where the party was held. There was so much to remember: Ivan and herself were attending the party as father and daughter who were long-time fans of Professor Vanko and his work. Natalia had changed her name from Natalia Romanova to Natasha Romanoff. A gun was located at her hip concealed by a secret pocket in her dress. Her new name sounded funny to her but she didn't complain. She wanted to do well.  
Ivan asked the driver to stop and they got out. Natalia couldn't help but gape at the beautiful building, it was more than 20 stories high, lights everywhere and guests poured out of their cars to reach the doors all fighting to get inside.

Ivan guided her inside where they stood next to a plant in a corner and one last time they went over the plan "Remember Natasha, I will not help you in this. This is your mission and it is up to you whether you pass or fail. Keep an eye on Vanko when he comes in, he will likely have some sort of protection and you must be swift. I will be watching you"  
"Yes father" Natasha nodded and headed off to a long table laden with trays of food and bottles of wine and champagne, Ivan didn't say anything about eating a little something before Vanko showed up.  
Natasha reached out for a strawberry and took a bite, it was delicious! She then picked up a glass of champagne and took a sip, the bubbly liquid tasted slightly bitter yet sweet as it went down her throat. Natasha felt a tap on her should "I think that in this country the legal drinking age is 21?" she quickly put the glass down and turned only to come face to face with a rather handsome looking young man who couldn't be more than 22 himself  
"I…I was only trying it to see what it tasted like!" Natasha quickly shot back  
"It's OK" the man winked "I won't tell anyone" Natasha blushed and looked around for her father but then remembered that tonight she was on her own.

Natasha smiled at the man and tried to excuse herself when a loud cheerful uproar erupted from nowhere, the large doors to their left opened wide and a man came in. Natasha recognised him right away as Professor Vanko and her target for the night.  
Quickly, Natasha turned to face the man again "That's Professor Vanko?!" Natasha feigned awe "I have read so much about him! My father and I are fans of his work"  
"Would you like to meet him?" the man asked offering her his arm "I'm working for him tonight, I'm sure he wouldn't mind meeting a fan especially one as lovely as you"  
"Uhh…thank you" Natasha took his arm and they made their way over to the Professor who was shaking hands with various businessmen and women.

Natasha's companion lightly tapped Vanko on the shoulder and introduced Natasha "Professor Anton Vanko, I would like you to meet my friend"  
"Natasha Romanoff, it's amazing to meet you!" Natasha shook his hand and looked every-bit the part of a breathless fan  
"Miss Romanoff, it's a pleasure to meet you" Professor Vanko took her hand in his and kissed it and then looked addressed the young man "Barton! What an amazing job you have done tonight!"  
"I do take my job seriously Sir"  
"You do at that!" Vanko smiled "Barton here is working security tonight, After all these years I still have old friends who would love to see me…pushing up daisy's, so to speak" he laughed, Natasha and Barton joined in  
"Well, that's not going to happen tonight, would you excuse me I have to go check on something" Barton shook Vanko's hand and smiled politely at Natasha before leaving.

Natasha had Vanko all to herself, but they weren't alone yet. How would she get Vanko alone? She was a Black Widow now and she couldn't even corner her prey!  
With her father watching, Natasha held her head high and looked toward the dance floor where couples were spinning and asked Vanko if he would like to dance.  
"Of course Miss Natasha, I would be honoured" Professor Vanko took her arm and led her to the floor where he took her in his arms.  
The music was between fast and slow, just enough to get you comfortable, Natasha knew exactly what she intended to do now.  
Vanko began to talk about his work as Natasha went over her plan in her head, nodding and smiling in all the right places – hardly caring about what he was saying. Natasha spun around and laughed, knowing that Vanko was slowly letting his guard down.

After a few minutes of dancing, Natasha asked for a tour of the building. Professor Vanko nodded and started talking about his work again, that this building was only one out of ten in his name. It was a very vast company who specialised in electricity, Vanko was working on controlling it so that it could be held in the palm of your hand and used as a weapon.  
For years, after he had left Russia, he had worked with a variety of people to acquire his dream and they were half way to completion.  
Opening a door to one of his many labs, Vanko began to explain the process of turning electricity into a hand held weapon, Natasha pretended to be fascinated as he slowly reached for her gun.  
Vanko voice was a dull drone to her until he mentioned a name, Ivan Petrovich, and she froze on the spot as Vanko explained that Ivan's ideas were too 'ugly' for him.  
Natasha waited until Vanko's back was turned before raising her gun and held it aiming at his chest as he turned around to show her a vile.

The vile smashed to the ground when he saw the gun and raised his hands "What are you doing Miss Natasha?"  
"I will not hear you talking about my father!" Natasha said icily "my father is a good man and you betrayed him!"  
"Your father? But he…never had children…or even a wife for that matter? My dear, why don't you put that gun down and we can talk, hmm?" Vanko reasoned with her  
"_You _are the traitor! _You _are the one who has done horrible things! You will pay for betraying him" Natasha was ready to shoot, ready to complete her mission, ready to finally make her father proud! So, why was she waiting?  
Vanko took advantage and went on, saying things about Ivan and his work, his work was sinister and horrid, his ideas were borderline maddening. Vanko finally fled Russia after destroying most of his unfished work. On and on he went, Natasha was filled with rage and confusion, her father was a good man yet Vanko was saying all these things about him.  
"…another of his plans was about spiders, I think, black ones. Black Widow Ops I think he called it" Natasha snapped out of it, cocked her gun and suddenly all her confusion had given way to pure rage, "Black Widow?" her voice was low and dangerous "_I am a Black Widow! _You'll never talk of my father again!" she shrieked and pulled the trigger.  
Once she started she couldn't stop, the rage she felt was overpowering. 5 times she shot him, seeing his blood pool on the floor.

Natasha stopped, and looked down, her gun in hand. Something inside her snapped again, her first mission was over, she had done it…she had _killed someone. _Was this what it was like? Natasha had just ended someone's life!  
Natasha had to think quickly, going into shock was NOT an option here! She would ran and pretend to have found him like that, it was stupid but it was all she could think of.

Natasha ran out screaming for help, people came over to her asking what was wrong, tears were streaming down Natasha's face as she explained. Clint raced over to her and asked if she was alright and where Vanko was. Natasha kept crying as Clint put a comforting arm around her, "all units to left wing of the building!" he said into a small microphone at his wrist and then addressed everyone else "everyone, clear the building now! I need-"  
Clint was unable to finish his sentence, a bright flash and then a large BANG came out of nowhere. Immediately, Natasha knew it was a bomb. The building started crumbling around them, people scrambled for the exists and were getting crushed by falling concrete and marble.

Natasha started looking around for her father, screaming for him at the top of her lungs in both English and Russian. The crowd pushed her in the opposite direction she wanted to go so she fought to gain control; she had to find her father! "FATHER! FATHER! ГДЕ ВЫ ОТЕЦ!" Real tears of panic ran from her eyes now, she couldn't leave her father here!  
A hand clasped her arm firmly "What are you doing, Natasha?! We have to get out of here!" Clint tried to pull her toward the exist but she fought him off  
"I need to find my father! PLEASE HELP ME!" Natasha screamed over the shrill crowd and thunder of the falling building  
"No, we need to go now!" Clint tried to hold her but she slipped from his grip and ran further into the building. Clint followed her.

Natasha ignored Clint's protests as she dodged falling marble, she called for her father, quickly moving aside fallen tables and jumping over pot plants.  
Clint followed behind her calling her name and trying to grab her "NATASHA! PLEASE!" he begged as he finally got hold of her again, Natasha cried against his chest, hitting him and cursing.  
Clint finally got Natasha to follow him to the exit, they both ran, Clint pulling her toward the exist as fast as he could and vowed that he would get her out.

A crack appeared in the roof, getting bigger and bigger until it caved in around them and everything went black.

**A/N: I'm so sorry this took so long but I had a lot of trouble with this chapter. I know it is terrible but I had to get it out of the way. Again, I'm sorry and I hope you'll keep reading. It does get better.**


	5. Chapter 4: THE PLAN

"Come on Nat! Tell us what happened!"  
"Yeah! You just went on your first mission; you _have _to tell us how it went!"  
"Spill it! SPILL IT!"

Natasha had been back home for a day now, the first thing she did when she did was take a shower and then, on her father's orders, went to see the doctor on staff.  
The doctor looked her over from head to foot and only found a few bruised ribs and large bumps and bruises and asked how she got them. Natasha explained that during her mission, a bomb went off and part of the roof caved in and much of it missed her (she deliberately left Clint out of this story) and then she later was found by Ivan amongst the rubble. The doctor nodded and said that she was free to go yet gave her an icepack for her ribs.

Natasha was found in her bed the next morning by all her sisters standing over her and refused to talk about her mission "Not now OK?"  
"Not an option Natasha you need to tell us everything!" Anya pulled her upright in bed and let her go when she winced  
"Just some bruised ribs and bumps, nothing to worry about" Natasha reassured Anya "the mission went well and I would say that I succeeded" Natasha wanted to end it there but Anya and the rest begged her for more details.  
Natasha told them about the building, the people and the glamorousness of it all and then "…and I danced…with a man" all the girls screamed happily and hugged Natasha and then quickly asked about everything, Natasha continued: "his name is Clint, he found me trying to steal a sip of champagne, did you guys know that the 'drinking age' of in America is _21! _Anyway, we talked and danced" Natasha's voice took on a dream-like tone "he was kind and strong and oh-so-cute! He was passionate about his job, he tried to get me out of the building so fast and was very protective!"  
a chorus of 'woo-hoo's' echoed out the door.  
Natasha hid under her blankets as they all started chanting 'Nata-sha-and-Cli-int-sit-ting-in-a-tree-K-I-S-S-I -N-G!'

A voice over the intercom asked Natasha to come to Ivan's office, Natasha gladly left her sisters, who were still giggling, and slowly made her way to Ivan's office.

"I am so proud of you my darling" Ivan hugged Natasha closely and then held her at arm's length and looked her over "not a scratch on you! A true Black Widow"  
"Thank you Father" Natasha smiled shyly and sat down "I hoped that I wouldn't let you or my sisters down"  
"You did very well, Natasha. I was watching every move you made and you did very well for your first time, even with the distractions" Ivan eyed Natasha and raised his eyebrows "a certain young man ring any bells?"  
"Yes" Natasha blushed "but I tried to forget him and focus, a Black Widow is always focused!" Natasha couldn't help but remember feeling butterflies in her stomach when he was with her that night but tried in vain to do her job.

Ivan got up from his chair and pulled out some files, these were thinner than the ones he had on Vanko, and gave them to her. Natasha read one word in big bold black letters:

**S.H.I.E.L.D**

The word was obviously an abbreviation. This was explained with a line of text underneath

**S**trategic** H**omeland** I**ntervention, **E**nforcementand** L**ogistics** D**ivision

In the file were papers and reports about the American organization: agents, field work and their accomplishments. Natasha stared at a picture of a young man with the name _Clint Barton _next to it. His file read that he had not been an agent for very long.  
Natasha looked up at Ivan now, "This is him! This is the man I met"  
"Yes, an agent for S.H.I.E.L.D and a good one despite the fact that he is new. Natasha, I have another mission for you, this should be easier than last time" Ivan pushed went another folder in front of her "inside this are plans for an old weapon of mine that Vanko took with him to America. I want these plans back, they could change everything! However, this agent Barton _might _know who you are and who you work for. Barton will most likely use it to kill you and your sisters and myself and you need to stop him before he does that"  
"Yes father, I won't let you down" Natasha stood up proudly "he'll be dead before he hits the ground" Natasha tried to ignore the knotted feeling inside her stomach, she had killed before and she could do it again.

OOOOOOOOOOOO

Clint sat at in a chair facing Nick Fury and Phil Coulson, he couldn't bring himself to look either of them in the eye. He failed, he failed on the very first mission. Clint couldn't be more disappointed with himself.  
Over and over Nick and Phil tried to make him feel better, praising about how he took charge and managed to get everyone out of the building in time before it came down. Clint mentioned the girl he was with, Natasha, and felt a pull in his heart. It was likely that she was gone.  
"Clint, the security footage shows differently" Phil pressed a button on a remote and a TV screen showed the rubble of the building, Clint being pulled to safety and checked over and then, to the far left of the screen, he saw Natasha and an older man, he assumed was her father, slowly get out and head for a car that sped off screen.

Natasha was alive.

Clint smiled softly to himself "I wouldn't get your hopes up Barton" Nick placed several photos and files in front of him "Miss Natasha isn't all she claimed to be"  
The files were about a Russian organization called Black Widow Ops, he had read about it before and hated what had been done to these girls. They were just 10 years old when they were taken and then made into killers. So this is what Natasha was; a brainwashed killer.

A pang of guilt and sorrow pierced his chest, "what do you want me to do" his face was now emotionless  
"Ivan Petrovitch used to work with Vanko, as you know, and while Vanko was in the process of running to us; he tried his best to destroy his work. He had plans for something big, something that could help people, make them fight off cancer and other deadly illnesses. Ivan wanted to warp this thing and change it to make people invincible, boost their immune system so nothing could hurt them and give them excellent stamina. Vanko has the plans and we think Ivan wants them back"  
"You want to take them before the Black Widows come for it?" Clint asked  
"Yes and bring it here so we can lock it away until we can make it and test it"

Clint didn't think that sounded too difficult, get in, get the plans and get out again. He nodded and accepted the mission, before he left he asked Nick if he could watch the security footage "why?" Nick asked  
"I like to get to know who I'm most likely going to kill" Clint took the tapes and the file to his room and look them over.

Once in his room, Clint put the tape into the video player and opened the file, he saw himself being dragged from the building and then Natasha with her father speeding away. The look of concern on his face was clear as day. Clint decided to rewind the tape to a more pleasant picture, he smiled when he saw himself with Natasha, she looked beautiful in her dress. Why had he not seen her as a killer?  
He then watched as Natasha and Vanko went off together, the camera changed angles and they went into one of the labs, Natasha listening as Vanko explained his work.  
Clint sat up straighter when Natasha took out her gun and pointed. Natasha hadn't shot him yet, Vanko was pleading for his life but then his expression changed, he looked like he was reasoning with her. Clint looked closely, why was Natasha not shooting him? Then Clint noticed a flicker of emotion cross Natasha's face – confusion? Fear? And then she shot him.

Clint rewound the tape again and again, why was that emotion on her face? He watched what Vanko was saying, he was good at reading lips:

_Your father? But he…never had children…or even a wife for that matter?_

Clint saw Natasha's face change then, that confusion, and watched again as Vanko began to talk about Black Widow Ops and again her face showed the same emotion.  
The girls in Black Widow Ops were brainwashed, made to think they were someone they weren't, Natasha believed that Ivan was her father, that she was always an assassin. Yet at the slight mention of this not being true caused Natasha to question it, only for a second.  
Could this life-long brainwashing be broken down until you were free? Could Natasha and all the other girls be free? Clint thought for a moment and felt hopeful. Instead of killing her, he wanted to help her, to save her.  
If he could help her get free, she could be anything she wanted, be who she was before all this and use her skills for good. She could join S.H.I.E.L.D.

Clint got up from his bed and strode to the door and went to find Nick and Phil, a plan already forming in his head.

"OK, explain it to me again Clint" Nick rubbed his forehead with his fingers  
"If you watch the tape I won't really have to! She has been _brainwashed _her whole life, I saw it when she tried to kill Vanko and he was begging for his life. One mentioned of Black Widow and her father and she looked like she didn't know who he was talking about but then she snapped out of it. I believe that this can be broken down over time and with gentle prodding. She and all the other could be saved!" Clint couldn't hide the excitement in his voice.  
Nick and Phil exchanged a glance "alright, let's just say that in theory you're right. If they can be saved, what would you have us do? Kidnap them and show them what they were before?" Phil asked  
"I have a plan. What about I become a double agent? I could work for Ivan and then get closer to Natasha and slowly but surely break the hold Ivan has on her and the others and bring them in to work for us" when they didn't say anything, Clint went on "I will be the perfect assassin yet send reports to you about my progress"  
"What if Ivan wants to brainwash you like he did all the other girls?" Nick asked sounding smug "how will you still be loyal to us?"  
"Actually, sir, we're working on something that could counteract such brainwashing, kind of like contact lenses that block out subliminal messaging through pictures, we haven't tested it yet but in theory it's supposed to stop you from being brainwashed" Phil looked down and kicked himself for even considering helping Clint with this mission.

Clint looked ecstatic, his plan could and would work, he just needed Nick's approval and he would work out everything else. Clint looked hopefully at Nick as he thought over everything about the mission and what could possibly go wrong. After he had weighed the pros and cons in his head he sighed and gave Clint the go-ahead.  
"You are to give us fortnightly reports and if I sniff out the slightest hint that you have gone over to their side, we'll have to kill you since you know all of our secrets"  
Clint understood why Nick was being harsh but nodded and was soon in his room packing for his mission, feeling hopeful that he would save Natasha.

**A/N: Sorry this took so long, I changed this chapter three times while writing it, and like the last chapter I had SO MUCH TROUBLE with this one! But I think it's getting good and can only get better from here!**


	6. Chapter 5: WE MEET AGAIN

Clint knew the plan, watch and wait and eventually Natasha would come. There were 10 S.H.I.E.L.D agents surrounding the building and some were even in the next room, waiting behind the door for their orders and willing to follow them to the letter.  
Hours had gone by and not even a shadow had crossed the wall yet Clint was determined for this to work. Just when he was about to give the order to retreat; Natasha climbed in through the window.  
One small hand gesture from Clint and the S.H.I.E.L.D agents knew that this was it, it was all happening right now. No second thoughts. No hesitation.

With a quick scan of the room, Natasha crept forward to the computer, turned it on and began to sift through the files. Her father said it was here – to get in, get the stuff and get out – but something felt wrong about this. Quickly Natasha grabbed her gun and spun around, there was no one there, it was all in her head. With a sigh, Natasha went back to the computer…which was now off!  
_What?! Why is it off? _She quickly tried to turn it back on and then noticed a shadow on the wall behind her and turned to attack.  
The assailant held up their hands in a gesture of surrender "Don't shoot! I'm here to help you, OK?" he didn't give her time to respond "there are agents surrounding the building and you're going to need my help if you want to get out alive"  
Natasha eyed the man with a mix of anger, fear and hesitation. She turned back to the computer wondering what to do "I have the files you're looking for, you have to trust me" the man came forward slowly; not wanting to scare her.

Natasha still had her gun pointed at him, "who the hell are you?" she demanded _and why do you look so familiar?  
_"You mean it hasn't clicked for you yet, Natasha?" Clint smiled a little  
"_You?!_" Natasha nearly dropped her weapon in shock "why are you here? Working for S.H.I.E.L.D?"  
"I said I'm here to help _you,_ I didn't say anything about S.H.I.E.L.D. It isn't safe to be here much longer, we have to move now" Clint pocketed a USB Natasha hadn't seen before and made his way for the door.  
Natasha didn't know what to do, Clint was here! So many questions raced through her mind.

A small beeping noise reached their ears, Natasha knew what it meant but Clint still continued for the door, Natasha sharply told him to stop and pushed him out of the way. The beeping stopped but was then followed by a loud bang, someone had let off a bomb. It wasn't a big one like at Vanko's party but big enough to confuse them.  
Natasha and Clint stood up and looked around quickly, the only available escape was the window, without a second thought they both jumped through it and hit the ground hard. Clint quickly got up and pulled his bow from over his shoulder and laced an arrow, seeing an agent standing at the window, he fired and smiled when it was a direct hit through their hand. The agent dropped their gun and fell to the floor.

_He is a good shot, I wish I was that good with a bow _Natasha thought as Clint guided her away from the building, the other agents were nowhere in sight but Clint knew they were there. With one small hand motion from their leader, three S.H.I.E.L.D agents sprang from the trees and started perusing them. Natasha shot at them again and again as they ran, managing to get one to go down and she didn't think they would get up, Clint held back his arrows missing by an inch on purpose not wanting to hurt them.

Just when Clint thought they were out of bullets, and ammo, something sleek and silver whizzed passed him and embedded itself in Natasha's shoulder; a throwing knife.  
Clint caught Natasha before she hit the ground _this wasn't meant to happen! She wasn't meant to get hurt in this! _Clint shot an angry look at the agent who threw the knife "What the hell did you do?! You _knew _the rules!"  
"Sir, I'm sorry, I didn't–" the agent tried to explain  
"Just get out of here NOW!" Clint barked and the agents did as they were told, it was all up to Clint now.

Clint looked down at Natasha, white as a sheet and gasping for air. She needed help, she needed medical attention. Clint slowly reached inside her suit and found a small rectangular remote with BW on it along with a button. It was a homing signal, to let her team know where she was and there was another button to say if she needed help. Just like the one he had with S.H.I.E.L.D. Clint wasted no time and pushed the button, it began to flash and send out it's signal, soon the other Black Widows would be upon them; ready to save her.

In just under a minute, a van came around a corner towards them and stopped, five Black Widow agents stormed out of the van and surrounded him. Clint put Natasha gently on the ground, held up his hands above his head after throwing his weapons to the ground "I'm unarmed, my name is Clint Barton. Your agent needs help. Do whatever you want with me but _please _get her help as soon as possible!"  
The Black Widows surveyed the situation but then decided that he was right, two agents picked up Natasha and placed her in the van while the other three took care of Clint. Knocking him unconscious after tying him up; Ivan would figure out what to do with him.

They sped off toward the airport. Toward home.


	7. Chapter 6: A NEW MEMBER

Clint woke up slowly, knowing that he was no longer in America. He sat up and then quickly regretted it, his head was pounding, his mouth was try and he was starving. Clint looked around his room, no windows, a video camera in the upper corner recording his every move, Clint wondered if someone was watching him right now. The room was made of grey concrete and was higher than he could reach; the only furniture in the room was his bed and a desk with a chair. No bathroom?!  
Clint didn't like that at all.

He wondered where exactly in Russia he was, where his weapons were and if Natasha was alright. He was in the Black Widows base, their leader, Ivan Petrovich, was somewhere in this building and somehow Clint had to convince Ivan to let him be a part of Black Widow Ops.  
Clint wondered how long he would have to wait until he finally met Ivan, or if he would meet him at all and what Ivan would do to him. It wasn't really his style to simply ask questions.

Hours seemed to go by. Clint tried to keep his mind occupied with various trivial things: counting to 100 and then counting down to 1 again, going over all the Russian he knew (he decided that it would be better to not let these people know he understood them) and doing other things.  
When his mind got tired, he turned to physical exercises: push ups, sit ups, lunges, jumping jacks (star jumps) and jogging around his cell.  
Finally someone came in, a girl no older than 17 by Clint's guess and she was carrying a tray of food, or what could be passed as food, and a glass of water. Clint tried to engage her but she responded in Russian that she was not allowed to talk to him. Clint stared back dumbly, pretending not to understand and continually asking questions of her.

When she left, Clint sat down with his tray of food: a small bowl of light brownish mush that smelled of fish, some rice with corn through it and a glass of water; barely enough to keep back his hunger pangs but he ate it anyway and gulped down the water.  
After he was done, he got to thinking about the girl, how long had she been part of all this? Did she have a family? Exactly how brainwashed was she?  
A voice over the intercom made Clint jump, it was an order in Russian that was then translated in English for him:

_"Встаньте к стене и поднимите руки над головой. Не делайте резких движений и вы будете расстреляны_"

_"Get up__against the wall and__raise your arms above__your head.__Do not make__sudden movements or__you will be shot__"_

Clint did what he was told, eager to meet someone else, and waited. After a minute or so four Black Widow agents came in, cuffed him and walked him out of the cell. Clint didn't need to ask questions about where they were taking him, he saw a door with a little man on it; a bathroom.  
They left him to do his business.  
Since he didn't need to go, Clint decided that now was the time to put his new contact lenses to the test, grabbing them out of his pocket he put one on each eye. For a moment his vision was blurry but after blinking a few times he could see perfectly. Clint hoped that Coulson was right and that they would work.

The agents took Clint down a hall away from his cell _so I guess I'm going to meet Ivan Petrovitch now _Clint thought as they walked through a set of doors into a large room.  
It was mostly white: white walls, white furniture and a hard concrete floor. A man, who Clint knew was Ivan stood behind the desk looking casual. Once Clint was seated Ivan waved the agents away and they were left alone and Ivan slowly came around from his desk and leaned against it.

"So, you are 'Clint Barton'?"  
"Yes, sir" Clint didn't make eye contact and tried to keep his answers to a minimum  
Ivan nodded and turned to a very large computer monitor and began to type a name, Clints picture and a small profile came up on the screen "this is you. Clint Barton, age 22, rogue agent of S.H.I.E.L.D gone off-grid two years ago and working the underground…"  
Clint smiled inwardly but kept his face blank, he knew that Nick Fury had somehow planted his personal file in their system and tweaked it to help him, he just hoped that Nick didn't take it too far  
"…a master of melee weapons and an expert in archery. A top agent. Tell me, Mr. Barton, if you were so highly thought of in your old agency, why run away? Why leave it all behind?"  
"I guess they were too timid for me, sir" Clint put on a serious voice "second guessing everything and being too merciful. Only killing when it was asked of me or when it was vitally necessary. Not my style. So I left and went off-grid for a while until something better came along"  
"My daughter?" A picture of Natasha and Clint came up on the screen at the push of a button "my daughter was something better?"  
"You are better, sir. Ruthless, kill now and ask question later" Flattery, Clint hoped it would work "I have read a lot about you and your agency"

Ivan gave a small laugh and turned away from Clint, pressing a few buttons on the screen before saying, "So, you want to be a part of my agency? You want to be a Black Widow?" The screen started to fade to black as Ivan started up the program "very well. Say goodbye to everything you once knew" and then it began.

Images everywhere on the screen, jolts of electricity surged through his body and into his brain, Clint convulsed and cried out but it was all an act. Coulson's contact lenses seemed to be working, Clint didn't feel anything changing but to keep up appearances, he still screamed and convulsed.  
Just when Clint was getting tired of pretending, the screen stopped projecting images and turned itself off, Clint closed his eyes and was panting hard.  
His cuffs were removed and he was pulled to his feet, Ivan called to the door "он готов к тест!" and a man came in pulling a young woman with him. The woman looked beaten half to death already, _what will I have to do? Beat her some more? _Clint didn't like that idea but was prepared to prove his loyalty.  
The man threw the woman to the ground in front of Clint, he didn't know whether to help her or hit her so I stood still. When the man saw that Clint wasn't going to do anything, he savagely threw his foot into the woman's stomach; hearing her screams nearly ripped Clint's heart apart. What was he meant to do!?

Clint watched as the woman was pulled up by her hair and then punched in the face sending her down to the ground again. Clint was filled with such rage at this but remained still, "your sister is being hurt" Ivan gestured calmly to Clint "_protect her!_"  
Clint stepped forward and caught the man's arm in a vice-like grip, taking his own knife; Clint drove it into the man's chest and then sent him to the ground with a kick to his stomach.  
He was dead. Clint felt his stomach churn but turned to help the woman up and then gasped when she turned to face him - it was _Natasha_!  
Clint held her arms as tight as he dared, what was Natasha doing being beaten up? Had she done something wrong?  
"What has…my sister done to deserve this kind of treatment?" Clint snarled  
"She was merely a test for you, to test your loyalty to me and my other daughters. You are a Black Widow now, you must protect them and put them above everything else" Ivan ordered

Clint didn't need to be told twice. This woman, Natasha, was the reason why he was here! The reason he had just killed a man, and why he would do anything to get her out of here. Clint took her hands in his and looked Natasha straight in the eye with such passion it frightened her, his words came from deep within him, more like a vow than a promise, his voice was soft yet deadly serious as he spoke nothing but the truth:

"Я буду защищать вас с моей жизнью"

**A/N: Sorry that I didn't make a note for you guys in the last chapter, I just wanted to get it out of the way so I could FINALLY write this one! Clint is finally part of Black Widow Ops! Ok, NOW it will get interesting, I hope.  
I have plans for future chapters but be warned they MIGHT be a bit cliché and High School-ish but I will do my best to make them as good as they can be.  
Keep reading and please leave a review! I love to hear what you guys think!**

TRANSLATION:

Я буду защищать вас с моей жизнью – _I will protect you with my life_


	8. Chapter 7: CAN'T KILL

Chapter 7

The news spread through the base like a plague. Black Widow Ops had its first male member in over 30 years! It was all any of the girls and women could talk about. In their beds they talked and giggled freely long into the night and by day they stole glances at him to see if any of the gossip was true. Clint was good with a bow and other melee weapons and his training was going well, he could do anything they could do but didn't show off if he could help it.  
Clint also looked like he got along with all of the Black Widows – even the new ones who were only 10 years old seemed to love him and think of him as an older brother.  
Ivan had introduced Clint to all of them formally and said that he would be treated like any other Black Widow and he was to protect his 'sisters' and think of them before he thought of himself.

Natasha had looked on in awe and hidden confusion. She listened to the gossip and stories but she had her own questions about the newcomer: who was he really? Why did he help her and why was he here now? As much as Natasha wanted the answers, she would have a hard time getting them for the only times he seemed to be alone was when he went to use the bathroom and when he went to bed. Natasha was NOT going to visit him in those places!  
Anya and the others always made excuses to talk to him or show him around the base which, for some reason, annoyed Natasha to no end. One night when the girls were getting ready for bed, a knock sounded at their door.  
"Hello, Anya" Clint nodded politely "can I speak to Natasha, please?"  
An excited murmur went through the room and Clint pretended not to hear it  
Natasha came out "Yes?" she asked  
"I just wanted to see if you were alright" Clint smiled in a friendly way "I haven't had much chance to check on you and I wanted to make sure you were ok after…you know"  
"Yes. I'm fine, a little bruised but I'll live" Natasha said awkwardly  
"I'll never let it happen again" Clint said in a soft voice "I mean it, it's my job to protect you and I plan to do it right"

Natasha blushed at his words, remembering when he said that very thing when he killed for her. A shiver went up her spine.  
They began to talk about how he was settling in. Clint went on about how this place was bigger than S.H.I.E.L.D and that the people were friendly and treating him well "yes, they are. I guess the others are just excited about someone new, just wait, it'll calm down after a week or so"  
"Are you excited about someone new?" Clint asked coyly with a glint of amusement in his eye  
"They had just better keep their head on straight" Natasha smiled back and went into her room again leaving Clint alone in the hallway.

Clint smiled as he walked down the hall to his own room, he had made contact and was sure that he would form a repour with Natasha before long. Nick Fury had sent him all the information they could find on Natasha specifically and read it through again and again trying to memorize it and slowly formed a plan in his head about how best to get Natasha to start remembering. He formed it in stages so as not to overwhelm her too much and would do it as subtly as he could so as not to arouse suspicion. Natasha had to be dwelt with carefully.

OOOOOOOOOOO

Clint sat in his room a few days later mulling over the information Fury had sent, Clint had sent only one report about his progress but it wasn't enough for Fury. Clint had to step up his game.  
The papers lay across his bed in random order, pictures of Natasha when she was a child, pictures of her parents and where she lived. There was information about the abduction that happened when Ivan finally came for her and then just various bits on all they had about Black Widow Ops.  
Clint knew he had to pretend to be on their side for now but he was finding it harder and harder with each day – Ivan was a cruel man and would stop at nothing to get what he wanted; even putting his 'daughters' at risk. He just didn't seem to care.

Clint heard his name over the intercom, Ivan was calling him into his office, and he decided that now was the time he would ask to go on a mission and when he would finally see the Black Widows at work. Clint waited outside Ivan's office until he was called in, Ivan greeted him with a pat on the arm and the offer of a drink "No thank you, Sir" Clint declined "I prefer to stay away from anything that would distract me from the job at hand"  
Ivan eyed him carefully but put the bottle of whiskey down on the table "Fair enough" he said and gestured for Clint to sit down "I have a mission for you, your training has gone well and it's about time you started earning your keep around here"  
"I'll do whatever I can" Clint nodded  
"Here" Ivan passed him a folder.

Inside were papers about the device he helped Natasha get on her second mission, when they met for a second time. It was just more information on where it was stored, how it worked, who knew how to operate it ect.  
Clint looked up from the folder "Didn't we already get this?" he asked  
"Yes, but there were certain papers and passwords I need for it to work properly. That will be your job. It's simple: just get in, get the information and get out again" Ivan explained  
"I will be doing this alone?"  
"No. I will send two agents with you to monitor you on how you go"  
"I won't let you down" Clint got up and Ivan excused him.

_Finally _Clint was going on a mission and with two agents going with him! He would see how they worked, make a note of it and then send off another report to Fury.

A knock came at his door while he was packing, he opened the door and smiled when he saw Natasha "I'll be going with you" she said and then made room for Anya to enter  
"So am I" she said and flopped down into one of the chairs "Father always tells us to pack light on a mission, depending on where we're going" Anya pointed at Clint's nearly full bag "you might want to re-think a few things"  
Clint nodded and unpacked and repacked his bag with their guidance.

In an hour they were all ready to go. Ivan wished them luck and to let him know if they needed anything at all while they were away, they said goodbye and then boarded a plane.  
Clint took a window seat while Natasha and Anya sat together and ordered food from the stewardess, Clint said he didn't want anything and the plane took off smoothly. In roughly 10 hours they would be back in America.

OOOOOOOOO

When the plane touched down, they were ushered straight to their hotel were they would be staying until the mission was complete. Since they would only be there for two nights they didn't get too comfortable, only unpacking the necessary things and keeping everything else in their bags.  
Clint took out some blueprints of the building they were be going for and where he would think their information would most likely be. Anya was itching to go right now but Clint would make them wait until the sun went down, Anya huffed in a board tone and lay on the bed.  
Natasha took a knife out from her belt and began to clean it. Clint cleaned his bow and arrows, checked his guns were all in working order and cleaned his knives too. There wasn't much else for them to do but wait after that.

It was then time to go. They marched to the building and scaled it until they came to the fourth floor. Clint's blueprints told them that this was where they were hidden. Clint made it clear that this was meant to be a clean mission, get in and get out and no killing if you could help it. Natasha nodded but Anya rolled her eyes and muttered that she would do whatever it took.  
Once a window was open, they all crouched inside and waited, once the room was deemed clear they searched it for the files.  
Anya came up with nothing, Clint was the same but Natasha found something related to what they were looking for in a filing cabinet. Clint was expecting to see S.H.I.E.L.D agents anytime now and was ready to go now they had found what they wanted _a nice clean mission.  
_The lights blazed on and an agent stood with a gun pointed at Natasha "hands in the air now!" he ordered  
Natasha slowly put her hands in the air, Anya pointed her gun at the man as did Clint but he wasn't ready to pull the trigger. The man instructed Natasha to hand over the files, she did and ignored Anya's protest "NATASHA! NO!"  
"She is a smart girl. She knows you are outnumbered" the man smiled  
"Natasha! Kill him! Shoot him!" Anya made Natasha grab her gun and pointed it at the man "do it!"  
Clint noticed a scared look in Natasha's eyes as she held the gun almost ready to shoot and stepped toward her.

Natasha wanted to kill him, _needed _to kill him but she couldn't bring herself to pull the trigger. This was different last time, the other man, Vanko, had been begging for his life when Natasha killed him, this man wasn't. This man was brave and standing up to her – he could hurt her if he wanted; he was a threat. So why couldn't she do it? Why was she thinking of Vanko now? Natasha was a Black Widow and was made to kill, it was her job!  
Natasha held the gun tighter and tried to make herself look at threatening as possible; knowing full well that Clint was watching her and that made her feel worse.

The man stepped toward her, Natasha flinched and a bang stopped him in his tracks. He made a horrible gurgling sound and fell. Natasha knew she wasn't the one who pulled the trigger. Anya had been the one and she did it as if it were nothing, almost enjoying watching the life fly out of him in seconds. She stepped to the body and ripped the files from his hand and turned to Clint and Natasha "Job done" she said in a dangerous tone  
"No! Not 'job done' Anya! This was not supposed to happen" Clint whispered loudly "now all the agents in this building will be on to us!"  
Natasha didn't say anything but watched as the two of them began to argue and only after a few minutes did she find her voice "Anya! Listen to our brother, we have to move _now_!"

They raced out the window, down the building and disappeared into the darkness.

They all chose different paths back to the hotel, each taking an hour in case they were being followed, until they were all accounted for. Anya and Natasha noted Clint's rage "what the hell happened?!" he yelled at Anya "this was meant to be a clean mission: get in and get out! No one was meant to kill anyone!"  
"He was going to kill us if I didn't do something! Natasha wasn't going to kill him anyway!" Anya sneered and Natasha looked down at her boots  
"It doesn't matter if she was going to or not, we didn't _have to _we could have just knocked him out and gone on our way"  
"But…but I needed to kill him" Natasha said in a small voice  
"No, Natasha. You didn't. You had a choice, you always do" Clint softened his gaze when he spoke to her, he wasn't angry with her after all  
"And she made the right the wrong decision!" Anya raised her voice "a Black Widow must do whatever it takes to keep herself alive!"  
Clint was seething with rage and had to bite his tongue from calling Anya every curse under the sun, with his fists clenched tightly he marched to the door and slammed it shut.  
From the outside it sounded as if one of them tried to follow him out but was stopped by the other.  
Muffled voices sounded and then it was silent.

Clint needed to be left alone, he walked down the hall, down a flight of steps until he found the reception area and the bar. He sat himself down and ordered a drink; his knuckles still white with anger.

A few hours later Clint made his way back to the room, he slipped the key into the lock and went in. Natasha and Anya were both asleep in the bed _looks like I'm having the couch tonight _he thought and went to have a shower. The hot water soothed him and helped clear his head, he was happy that his anger had changed to only that of mild annoyance now.  
Clint got dressed and then dried his hair with a towel, when he went out to collapse on the couch  
he paused when he found Natasha sitting there "It's good that you came back" was all that she said  
"Of course I came back. Did you think I would abandon you?" he smiled  
"Maybe not me but Anya…maybe" Natasha shrugged and made room for him to sit next to her "Anya was very angry at us, more so me than you. I should have taken the shot"  
Clint didn't know what to say so he stayed quiet until she began to talk again "I guess I'm pretty shit at this. I shouldn't be a Black Widow"  
"Yes you should. You're smart, fierce, determined and know your way around weaponry" Clint pointed out reassuringly  
"But what kind of Black Widow can't kill?!"  
"You have killed before, what was different now?" Clint asked  
"The first time I killed…I don't know. I was following orders I guess but _seeing _that man beg for his life and how scared he was, it just made it worse. I know that this time was different, that man wanted to hurt us and it was down to him or us…I know that I had to choose us, in my head I did, but I just couldn't" Natasha's voice wavered and Clint thought she might cry, he placed a hand on her shoulder  
"Nat…" he paused and chose his words carefully "talk to me, maybe I can help. Tell me about your first kill, why was it different to the idea of killing someone who wanted to hurt you"  
"That first man, he said things that–that made me stop and think…they were lies" she wasn't looking at him "things about my father and what I was"  
"If they were lies and you know them to be so, then why still think about them?"  
"You didn't see it! You weren't there! His eyes! They were screaming for me to let him live"

Clint knew what Vanko had said but didn't expect for Natasha to hold onto it like this, maybe it was going to be easier than he thought?  
Clint reassured her that she did the right thing last time, to not let it get to her and that what Vanko said was all lies. It pained him to see her like this but he knew it was for the better. Natasha didn't say no to Clint telling her to get some sleep, that it would all look better in the morning.  
They said goodnight to each other and parted, Clint staying on the couch and Natasha sinking into the bed next to Anya.

Clint lay awake thinking of what Natasha had told him and how she remembered her first kill, how it affected her so. Maybe she would break through this herself? He smiled at the thought yet still made a plan to help her in any way he could.  
Clint rolled over and closed his eyes and when he woke up the next morning he wasn't sure if he had dreamed it or not when he heard Natasha's voice from across the room

"Goodnight Clint…thank you"

**A/N: I am SO sorry it has taken me almost three weeks to get this out to you all! I just don't know what is wrong with me. I had a plan but it just shot out of my head with this chapter. I wrote it and re-wrote it several times before I was happy with it.  
I know that I probably SHOULD have a set date for chapters (once a week?) but I just can't do that. I write when inspiration comes and that could take a long time sometimes. I will get it out when I can. Please read and review, I would love to hear what you all think.  
Any ideas and help would be much appreciated!  
There will be some 'Clintasha' scenes to come too and maybe even a betrayal!**


	9. Chapter 8: NIGHTMARES(?)

_Natasha heard distant screaming, she could feel slight heat at her back and tried to turn towards its source but her feet seemed to be rooted to the spot. All she could do was go forward. One foot in front of the other seemed like an easy enough task but, for some reason, it was harder than usual. It felt like she was in knee-deep mud.  
The screams and heat faded away and a figure appeared in front of her "FATHER!" Her voice was working normally but she couldn't figure out why she was speaking English instead of her native Russian…but it felt right, better somehow.  
Natasha made her way to her father as fast as she could, when she reached him Natasha threw her arms around him asking for help "please father! I don't know where the others are! Help me find them! Help me find the Black Widows father!"  
But it was not Ivan who answered, Natasha looked up into his eyes and saw Clint's staring back at her, he was holding her in a different way "I can help. Let me help you Natasha" Clint rested his lips on her forehead as he spoke again this time in Russian: "_Я буду защищать вас с моей жизнью"

_There was more heat now, Natasha thought it was the same heat that she felt earlier but couldn't find where it was coming from, now it seemed to be all around them. The sound of wood burning reached her ears but Clint seemed deaf to it and no amount of pleading could get him to move. Natasha let out a scream…_

  
The room was bright as Natasha quickly sat up in bed, drenched in sweat from her nightmare. Panting and running her fingers through her hair, Natasha got out of bed feeling like she hadn't slept at all. All she could think about was the dream.  
She thought that if she concentrated hard enough, she could almost still hear the burning wood and smell the smoke; _don't be stupid! _Natasha scowled herself.

It had been several weeks since Clint, Anya and herself had got back from their mission, it wasn't _exactly _unsuccessful but both Natasha and Clint thought it could have gone better.  
Then Natasha gasped and sat up wide-eyed in bed as she remembered…she was late for water skills training! All the other agents had forgotten to wake her! Natasha quickly got dressed and raced down the hall, hoping that she would make the final training exercise.

When she got to the large indoor pool though; they were finishing up. The training exercise was over and she missed it! The others girls greeted her with smiles and began to explain what they did, one girl's voice dropped to a whisper "and one lucky girl got partnered with _Clint!_"  
"Who?" Natasha asked but then rolled her eyes…Anya of course.  
There she was, wearing a wet black T-shirt and jeans, her hair in wet ringlets down her back. Anya always looked stunning. She strolled over to where Clint was standing drying himself with a towel "Thanks for being my partner Clint" she gave a flirtatious smile "Nat is usually my partner but…she slept in, she hardly ever misses training" she gave Natasha a side-long look "I should have you save me more often, Natasha always holds on way to tight"  
"I'm sure that Natasha had a good reason for missing training, Anya" Clint seemed oblivious to Anya when he caught sight of Natasha and gave her a slight wave.

Clint knew that his progress was slow, he wasn't getting the results he wanted and Fury knew it. Clint had sent off a small report that morning in private about the talk he had with Natasha; Nick just told him to keep at it.

Clint walked over to Natasha and gave her a smile "we missed you this morning"  
Natasha smiled back  
"You hardly ever miss a training session, sister" Clint stepped aside when Anya appeared next to him  
"I slept in" Natasha shrugged and looked away from Anya  
"You look like you haven't slept at all" Clint gave her a concerned look "are you feeling alright? Maybe I should get you something from the doctor here"  
"No, no I'm fine, really" Natasha waved him away and followed the other agents out trying hard to strike up a conversation so that Clint would stop staring.

Clint knew that right now there was no talking to Natasha about why she wasn't sleeping but he knew he had to talk to her again; in private if possible. If Natasha wasn't sleeping that could only mean one thing – his plan was working. Implanting ideas in her head and waiting for _her _to come to _him _for information and answers about what was happening to her. It felt better to him than just flat-out telling her about her past and potentially having her attack him. This would work but it needed time and patience.

Usually when Clint had time to spare he would work on his archery and melee weapons skills or explore the base and learn more about it, always making mental notes about it to give to Nick Fury back home, however, lately, he often found himself spending time with some of the younger Black Widow agents. The young girls, between the ages of 15 and 10, couldn't seem to get enough of their 'big brother' but not in the way the older agents did – defiantly _not _that way – but they enjoyed his company. They would play games when they had free time, hide and seek was their favourite, but they would also just sit down all around him while he read to them (it helped Clint learn even more Russian) but they asked more and more about his old agency. Clint told them a little about S.H.I.E.L.D but would always try his best to curve the conversation back to something else.  
Clint enjoyed spending time with the children and felt bad for them, when all of this was over he silently promised them that he would find their parents or at least make sure they were adopted into good homes.

Right now as he followed the other agents out into the hall, Clint went straight to see his little friends; they greeted him excitedly "Клинт здесь!" _(Clint is here!)_ One of the small girls jumped into his arms  
"Вы пришли к нам читать?" _(Have you come to read to us?)_  
"Хотите играть в игры?" _(Do you want to play a game?) _All the little girls were crowding around him now and jumping up and down. Clint couldn't refuse them.  
Gently, he put the little girl he was holding down and sat down himself, immediately the other girls sat down and crowded around him eagerly awaiting a story. Clint began to make up a story in his head:

**A/N: As Clint will be telling the story in Russian you won't understand what he is saying and I don't really feel like translating it all so I will put the story in **_**italics **_**for you and you can pretend that it's Russian. Sorry about this. Now back to the story!**

"_Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess who lived in a faraway land. The princess had many sisters and a loving father. For many years they were all very happy, until one day when a knight came to visit the castle after hearing much about all the beautiful princesses. See, the knight was from a different kingdom and his king knew about the princesses' father, he was a dark and cruel man yet the princesses had no idea. They were perfectly happy living their lives. The knight found one of the princesses in a garden outside the castle, she had hair as red as the flames from a dragons breathe, she caught the knights attention without even knowing. This knight, who believed that everyone should have a pleasant life free from evil and cruelty, vowed to protect the princess and free her and her sisters and take them all back to his kingdom. The knight had a hard time trying to talk to the princess_"

Clint knew that his imagination was running away with him, his own feelings were spilling into the story, but he couldn't stop himself, he continued:

"_she was so beautiful and strong that he didn't think she would even want to talk to the knight. The knight tried his best to help the princess, they had become friends since his arrival at their castle, the knight felt himself liking the princess and that only made him want to save her all the more._"

He paused and looked around at all the girls, sure enough they were soaked up in his story and looking at him with their bright eyes full of life and hope, Clint quickly made up an ending to finish the story, much to the girls' dismay. He went on to say that the princess and the knight managed to save all the other princesses and overthrow their evil father and rode away on white horses to the knight's kingdom.  
All the girls begged for more but Clint declined, feeling truly sorry, and got up from the floor "Пожалуйста, оставайтесь старший брат!" _(Please stay big brother!) _One clung to his waist  
"Расскажите, пожалуйста, больше! Что происходит с принцессой?" _(Please tell us more! What happens to the princess?) _asked another  
Clint held up his hands and said there would be no more story for now, that he had to leave but he would be back soon to tell them another story.

Trying not to focus too much on the sounds of sniffing and crying, Clint left the girls behind and made his way down the hall, he wished he could spend more time with them, they needed him, but if he were to carry out his mission he would be doing more for them than reading the odd story every now and then.

Turning to walk up a flight of stairs Clint looked around casually to make sure no one was following him and then took the stairs four at a time. With Nick Fury sending him plans of the Black Widow base, he knew his way around and knew exactly what he was looking for. After walking down another hall and then turning right he found himself at a door. Ivan's office. Inside was what he needed, inside was information about the _real _backgrounds of all the agents here: where they came from, who their families were and if they had extended family or not. This could be a turning point in his mission.

Heading straight for the large filing cabinets, Clint began to sift through them, pulling out random ones and reading a few pages here and there before replacing it. He found Natasha's file but already knew most of what was in it already but then came to Anya's file. This surprised him.  
Lightly skimming through the pages he read _No parents, found in psyche ward…multiple personality disorder…breaking down…possible candidate for new training regime…very promising…  
_It looked like Anya was the new guinea-pig for something that Ivan was working on with the Black Widows, all of these entries to her file looked recent and was full of scans and data. Clint was so absorbed in what he was reading about the Black Widow agent that he nearly jumped out of his skin when a hand lightly tapped him on the shoulder.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Natasha lay on her bed now, feeling happy that she was alone but deeply annoyed with herself. She _never _missed training! Now Natasha would have to work harder to catch up and all because of a few bad dreams!  
The dreams. Nightmares. Natasha dared not think about them in public but now that she was in her room, she was free to think about them. It was always the same dream: the sound and smell of burning wood, feeling lost and running to her father but then finding Clint there and reminding her of his promise. His words sent shivers down her spine and butterflies sprang up in her stomach.

Clint said that he would be there for her and protect her with his life, surely he meant to say that about all the Black Widows, and so far he had kept his word. He had helped her on his mission, been supportive and comforting when Natasha told him about her first kill. Natasha's sisters had told her about men on their own missions, that they were 'stress relief' and only thought of getting one thing from a woman. They didn't care that the men didn't care, they each got what they wanted and parted ways. The whole thing seemed strange to Natasha.  
Hadn't she gone on 2 missions now? Both times Clint was with her and both times he was nothing like her sisters described.  
Clint was nice to her, talked to her, and made her feel safe. He never tried to get anything from her at all.

Natasha thought again about her dreams, they were bothering her but talking about them with someone she trusted as much as she was starting to with Clint might help. She got up from her bed and left her room, trying to figure out where Clint would be at this time. Natasha saw a woman up ahead, she didn't think much about it until she saw that it was her sister; Anya. Anya looked up a flight of stairs whilst trying not to be seen before scaling them herself.  
Forgetting all about Clint for the moment, Natasha followed Anya and made sure that she herself wasn't seen.

_Why is she going to fathers' office? _She asked herself as she scaled the stairs, stopping just before the last few steps.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Clint spun around to dropped the file, Anya was staring back at him with a soft smile on her face "Dear brother" she said kindly "if you wanted to know more about us" something in her eyes changed and made Clint's stomach turn "Clint, you only needed to ask" her voice had taken on a flirtatious tone.  
Clint could only stare back as she started slowly stroking his face "what do you want to know about us" Anya asked  
"Anya…" But what could Clint say?! He had no idea how to go about dealing with this  
"You look scared" Anya came even closer so that their bodies were pressed together and they were leaning back against the cabinet "you don't need to be scared" Clint could feel his body betraying him as he tried to think of a way out "let me help you" and at that Anya's lips were on his.

"Anya…?"

Clint felt his blood run cold as he heard her voice…Natasha!

They both stared at the door, "Nat!" Clint said weakly  
"What's…what's going on?!" Natasha couldn't hide the fear, the shock that swelled up in her eyes  
"Sister" Anya smiled at Natasha "Clint only wanted to know more about us"  
"You…Anya!" Natasha couldn't do anything but feel a burning rage deep inside her. She looked from Anya to Clint trying to understand  
"Natasha" Clint shoved Anya roughly away and didn't feel any sympathy as she hit the floor "believe me I…she"  
"Clint is our BROTHER! He protects us! Takes care of us and you do this!?" Natasha grabbed hold of Anya and pulled her to her feet, pure rage in her eyes  
"I was willing to give him anything he was looking for" Anya said and then began to laugh "a good Black Widow does whatever she can to get the information"

Clint and Natasha both stared at Anya, Natasha knew Anya longer but Clint knew that this wasn't normal "I'll…should I go and get someone?" he asked  
Natasha nodded, still looking at Anya "this isn't normal for her…she was always ambitious but…maybe get father" Anya now looked dazed and confused, Natasha stared down at her sister. What was wrong with her?

**A/N: Sorry to end on a cliff-hanger and with something so out of the blue but this DOES mean something in future chapters TRUST ME! It will make sense! Sorry for not a lot of Clintasha either, that is on its way too. I'm sorry for this. I might go back and edit some of it in the future.**

As always read and review! Would love to hear what you think! 


	10. Chapter 9: NEW MISSION AND TRAINING

Natasha sat crossed legged on her bed deep in thought. It had been two days since Anya had started acting strange. Two days since she had been carried away by her father's two most trusted men. She did not say a word to Natasha or Clint when she was being taken away, just had a faraway look in her eyes and a half smile on her face.  
Natasha and asked to see her but her father refused outright, saying that Anya was unwell and needed to rest; she had been under a lot of stress lately.  
Natasha and Anya were sisters, best friends and would tell each other everything, if something was bothering Anya, why didn't she come and talk to Natasha about it? This question raised another issue on her mind: she had found Anya kissing Clint. She was kissing him. Natasha didn't even know that she liked him. Of course all the girls liked him but she hadn't thought that Anya would do that.

The whole thing confused Natasha. Anya obviously knew what she was doing; she had been with men plenty of times before on her own missions. She knew her way around them. Natasha felt a swirling sensation in her stomach as she mentally replaced Anya with herself but then shook her head out of frustration.

Clint hadn't been to see her after what had happened and she was thankful. Not that she was angry with Clint, it was obvious that he wasn't egging Anya on or anything; he was just as shocked as she was. What also came to mind was that Natasha was on her way to tell Clint about her dreams but now, after what she saw, Natasha wasn't feeling up to it. She didn't want to talk about the dreams, not with Clint, something had changed she felt it deep inside. A stirring hunger that told her that what Clint had said about protecting her even more true, that she should trust him more than ever. Natasha wanted too but she didn't know how to talk about it.

With a frustrated sigh, Natasha got up and grabbed a towel and headed for the pool. Natasha thought she might as well get to work on catching up with the water skills training.  
Thankfully, no one was in the pool when she got there, Natasha placed the towel on a bench and dived into the water fully clothed. It was a strange feeling swimming in her clothes but they had to do it for training.  
After a couple of laps, her shirt and pants were getting heavy, swimming was becoming more and more difficult until she submitted defeat and got out.

Natasha wrung her hair out and sat on the bench next to her towel, not caring about the rest of her and stoped to think again. Eventually, She would go on missions again, possibly even with Clint, and she didn't want anything between them. Clint seemed to know when she wanted to talk about something so there would be no use trying to hide it from him. Natasha decided that a direct approach was needed, if she wanted to talk and get things out in the open then she would find Clint and make him listen. A Black Widow always went after what she wanted.

With that thought in mind, Natasha walked determinedly out of the pool and into the hallway and went to find Clint.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Clint sat at his desk with another report to send to Nick Fury about what he had found out about Anya

_Something deeper is going on. One of the Black Widow agents has started acting strangely, I went through her file and found evidence of some mental instability and Ivan still recruited her. This one girl is different from the others, unstable, but why would Ivan want her?  
The Target is responding well to my slight probing. She has not been sleeping well and I suspect she is having dreams/memories about her past. This is a good sign. I am getting somewhere. I think I just need a little more time before she trusts me outright. Something happened that I think might have damaged her trust but I will work fast to fix it._

With a heavy sigh he put the pen down, it wasn't as long as the others but it was something. Something was better than nothing.  
Clint gave it one final look before tucking it away to send off later and then sat back to think. Anya had kissed him and Natasha and found them, the look of fear, shock and betrayal in Natasha's eyes sent chills through him as he remembered. Clint now feared that Natasha's trust in him had gone for what he had done; he prayed that was not the case and was willing to work very hard to get it back. If Natasha didn't trust him then the whole mission was lost.

Clint heard footsteps coming toward his room and then a loud knock at the door "Clint?! It's Natasha" Clint's stomach did flip flops as he got up to let her in "we need to talk" she said in a serious tone while Clint stepped aside as she entered  
"Natasha–"  
"_She kissed you_!" Natasha blurted out "Anya kissed you"  
Clint didn't know what to say, he stared at her as she continued  
"Anya has…she has always been forward…she tells me about her missions all the time and well, it was nothing new to me but to see it…and with _you_!"  
"Tasha" Clint came forward and put a comforting hand on her shoulder and looked her right in the eye "I'm sorry that I upset you but please know that I had nothing to do with it. I hope that you still trust me. I'm still here for you" he smiled softly preying that it was all ok and that nothing was ruined.

Natasha eyed Clint, she knew what he was saying was true, she knew he was still 'Clint' and that seeing Anya kiss him didn't make him seem any different to her, however now that she was looking at him, something in the way she felt about him made him look different. Natasha was very confused and tried to but her thoughts to words: "I know that you…wouldn't want to hurt me Clint, but seeing my sister who I have known all my life, seeing her do that…with you, it made me feel so…" she paused but then went on trying to change the subject "we are part of the Black Widows, we _need_ to work together. There needs to be nothing hidden from each other. No secrets because it might affect how we work together on missions and that could prove fatal. Understand?"  
"Yes" Clint nodded "is there anything you want to talk to me about?" he asked  
"Of course there is!" Natasha exclaimed only she didn't know how to put it into words "I know that I can trust you, I do, but I think something is happening to me, I have been having these dreams"  
Clint patted a space on the bed "why don't you tell me what's wrong, maybe I can help"  
"These dreams just came out of nowhere" Natasha sat down on the bed without looking at him "it's always the same: the smell of burning wood, screaming from a man and woman and then I see my father standing there. I try to go to him but I can't and then when I finally get to him, it's not him anymore" Natasha now built up the courage to look at Clint but then regretted it, his eyes made her stomach fill with butterflies _trust him _she thought, she went on "It's you. It's always you who I run into, you tell me to trust you. The burning gets more intense and then I wake up"

Clint wanted to put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, he wanted to tell her that everything was going to be alright and that all of this was his doing but it was all for her own good. Clint hated making her feel like this.

Natasha blew a frustrated groan from her lips and placed her head in her hands "I'm sorry"  
"For what?" Clint asked softly, without thinking he had come forward so that he was sitting closer to her, and placed a hand on her leg "for telling me how you're doing? How you're feeling? That's important. It's good to let someone know how you feel, think and all that, if you don't then people don't know and they worry, they could come to a false conclusion and that could really screw things up!" Clint tried to lighten the mood  
"We're going to go on missions together, or with other people and it's important that we know each other inside and out, there is to be nothing between us. That's why I am, or was, so close to Anya. Now she isn't the same, she is acting so weird!"  
"Have you tried talking to her, asking her why she…kissed me?"  
"I really don't want to talk about that with her" Natasha shot back a little too aggressively "I don't want to hear about it. When you first came here, you were all any of the others could talk about. Now with all of this stuff with Anya and…your kiss with her…I can't go through that again! It was annoying, it was almost degrading. You are here to protect us, take care of us. I hate hearing the other girls talk about you like you're a piece of meat or something"  
"I like it when you're honest" Clint smiled warmly "but their talking didn't bother me that much, I know the truth and that's all that matters"

Natasha smiled back at Clint, feeling warmth and trust spread through her again, she was happy that Clint and herself were talking and still on friendly terms but something in the back of her mind, a feeling, worried her a little. Before Natasha could even begin talking about it, opening up to him even more, they were disturbed by a voice over the intercom:

_Agents Clint and Natasha, please come to my office at once!_

Without waiting for Clint, Natasha quickly got up and went to the door, Clint following behind. What was this about?

They knocked on Ivan's office door and entered when he asked them to and sat down. They both thought about the last time they were in here, the kiss, they both felt uneasy but tried not to show it in front of Ivan.  
Ivan began to speak "I would like to speak to you two about some pressing matters that took place here a few days ago" Natasha and Clint said nothing, Ivan continued "I already know that neither of you are to be blamed for what happened. Agent Anya has been under a lot of stress and has become a little weak but that should pass in a few weeks of extra training"  
"Please Father, how is my sister?" Natasha chimed in "may I see her? Talk to her about…what happened?"  
"I am afraid not. Anya has been placed in special care in the infirmary and is being monitored, any reminder of what happened might spark something like what happened before. No, it is best if you don't see your sister at this time" Something in Ivan's voice let both Clint and Natasha know that the matter was settled  
"Sir, what is this about?" Clint asked "can we help in anything?"  
"Actually I have a mission for you, for both of you"  
Natasha and Clint stole a look at each other  
"There is a man named Ian McMasters, he is very smart. He is the CEO of a company that creates and uses chemical weapons, he has refused to work with me for the past three years, coming up with excuses to turn me down. You know what happens when someone says 'no' to me too many times" Ivan gave Natasha a look and she nodded, Natasha had watched her sisters go on missions to deal with 'trouble-makers'.

Natasha believed that her father was a good man and anyone who refused to work with him was an idiot. The memory of Vanko flashed in her mind and she looked down at the desk.

"I am afraid of I go, he will recognize me straight away and run before I have the chance to talk, explain, I think if you two go, he might reconsider my offer"  
"Why do you need both of us?" Clint asked "why not just one of us?"  
"It has come to my attention that Ian has recently gotten married and is staying at the Sunset Paradise resort in Hawaii, a very nice place for a honeymoon, and possibly to make a business arrangement. That is where you two come in"  
Again, Clint and Natasha looked at each other but listened intently  
"You two will pose as a newlywed couple on your own honeymoon, you will make friends with Ian McMasters and his wife, get to know them, get to know about Ian's work and then reveal who you really are and who you work for. Let him know that this is his last chance and if he refuses, I want you to kill him. You only say no to me so many times before I lose my patience"

No one spoke for a short while, Clint tried to look at Natasha, to see how she was handling this but she was looking down at the desk again, he could read on her face that she was nervous. Natasha brought her head up and spoke in a not-to-confident voice "Father, this mission, maybe one of the other girls should do it?"  
"I had thought to send Anya" Natasha felt her stomach clench "but do to recent events she is not able to do it"  
"Father, maybe I am not suited to this mission, it will be only my second mission, I am inexperienced so do you really think I am the best pick?" Natasha hoped that Clint couldn't hear how much she didn't want to do this  
"My decision is final, Natasha. You need more experience working in under different situations anyway, this is the perfect mission for you" Ivan eyed Clint now "and I trust that while you are working you keep up your end of our bargain, protect Natasha and get through this mission together or die trying. Understand?"  
"Yes sir" Clint nodded and got up from his seat expecting now that they were given their assignment, they were excused.  
Ivan gave them their leave and they walked out, both feeling slightly nervous but trying not to show it.

As they walked away from Ivan's office Clint could see that Natasha was thinking about the mission, he tried to make a joke "So, Natasha _sweetheart _what did you want to do for dinner?"  
"Please don't call me that!" Natasha shot back "or anything other stupid nickname"  
"Hey, I was only trying to make you smile…are you ok?"  
"No! I can't do this Clint! I can't do this mission with you, father should have chosen another girl for this and he knows it!"

They had arrived at Clint's room and went in so they could talk about the mission in private "Nat, everything is going to be fine, so you'll have to pretend to be my wife for a few days, so what?"  
"I can't pretend to be anyone's wife! I don't know how to act all in love and all that" she gave him an embarrassed look "the others are so much more experienced than me!"  
"This is why he is sending you on this mission, to gain experience. It'll be fine" Clint sounded reassuring "I'll be right by your side the whole time, no need to worry"  
"How am I meant to think of you _that way _or anyone else…I can't do this" Natasha threw her hands up and crossed them over her chest  
"You're worried that your inexperience will compromise the mission?" Clint asked with a smile on his face "well, I made a promise to our father that I would help you–"  
"No! I'll get help somewhere else"

Clint came forward and said gently "we're going to have to pretend to be married, newlyweds and we'll have to look convincing. You're going to have to be comfortable around me" Clint felt himself growing hot  
"I'm…I'm perfectly comfortable around you, I trust you. You know that" Natasha felt her voice wavering "we'll be fine at this"  
"Kiss me"

Natasha felt her insides go hot as his request _kiss me _was that really what he asked? Natasha refused to look at him she couldn't look into his eyes, he was sure to see that she was terrified. Clint smiled and took hold of her shoulders "Nat, if we're going to act like husband and wife, you're going to have to kiss me and look comfortable doing it. Pretend I'm not who I am, I'm not your brother. Kiss me and we'll see how it goes"  
Natasha wanted to refuse, to say no and that it was a dumb idea, they didn't need to act like this but one look in his eyes and she felt her voice hitch in her throat.  
Natasha looked at him now, really looked at him, and saw what all the other girls were talking about.

Clint had strong arms, probably from pulling his bow string all the time, his hands looked rough yet she could imagine him having the gentlest touch on her skin. Natasha felt her cheeks burn, many of the girls had kept her up at night with their giggles and talking about how they wish they were in her position right now, Natasha now only wanted to run away. She couldn't kiss him.

Clint tried not to scare her, he came forward slowly and touched a hand to her cheek, turning her head to face him. Clint looked down into her eyes, she looked scared, yet slightly excited and he smiled tenderly, slowly tracing a finger along her jawline tilting her face ever so slightly to the left and moving his face closer to hers as he did so.  
When their lips met the only thought Clint had in his mind was of fire. Natasha was like a small flame, so delicate yet if you gave it enough room to thrive it would engulf you. Clint had to be careful, anything he did could be taken the wrong way.  
Slowly, Clint embraced her, bring her closer to him, he could feel Natasha resisting and thought he should back away, it had gone on long enough but then Natasha started to kiss him back.

Natasha had no experience with kissing, she only had to go on whatever her sisters told her, yet all that information had flown out of her head and was replaced by something else. A need. A hunger that was slowly starting in her stomach and then spread everywhere. It was like fire and it seemed the only way to make it go away was to cling tighter to Clint, to kiss him back.  
A small moan escaped her lips as Clint put his arms around her, Natasha never wanted to let him go but then, all too suddenly, he broke the kiss.  
They were both panting, Clint made sure to leave enough space between them, to make her more comfortable he told himself.

Natasha turned away, a small smile on her face. Her first kiss. It was both scary and exhilarating at the same time. It was with _Clint _of all people! She found her body demanding another kiss, screaming for the fire, the desire again yet she only turned to face him again and, trying to hide her shaking voice, she said "well…thank you…for that…that piece of training. It will come in handy on our mission"  
"Natasha, was that your–?"  
"My first kiss? Yes it was. But it was no big deal, a kiss is a kiss right? And we need to do whatever we can to make our roles look more convincing. Thank you again"  
"Nat…" Clint stepped forward and took her hand, stopping her from opening the door "Nat, if I…if I had known that was your first kiss, I would have…I mean–"  
"It was very nice, you didn't do anything wrong. At least we can get on with our mission"

Natasha left him then, her face burning red. She would have given anything to stay and kiss him some more but something else inside her told her that it was enough to have kissed him once. It was enough for now. Natasha touched her lips with a finger, she could still taste him on her lips.

**A/N: Ok wow. How long has it been since I updated? I'm so very sorry but LOOK! Finally A KISS! A KISS! As always read and review and I hope you enjoy!**


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